Martial Arts should be realistic!

When it comes to just about any sort of geeky medium, if there's something that sells, it's fight scenes. My friends are pretty unanimous in having 300 listed as their favorite movie. Which is, of course, just one big fight scene. With a rape scene thrown in. In fact, even the Political scenes had stabbing in them. There are two reasons why my “friends” would be so fond of this movie; either it's because they're idiotic, testosterone-driven teenagers, or it's because fight scenes sell.

More often than not, a Martial Art or two is included. Of course, in most of these scenarios, the Martial Art is done almost no justice and it's all thrown away in favor of gratuitous fanservice. Realism is traded in for the ridiculous fantasies of men and women (who liken themselves to “Writers”, I guess) that include post-human stunts with no real explanation.

I think that the worst perpetrator here is this anime and manga stuff that's becoming so popular over here in the states. The Japanese stuff. It goes without saying that there are exceptions, but, while I am not opposed to the idea of Magical Karate, I would like to see some realistic magical karate. That is, characters who cannot inexplicably jump ten stories high or seemingly have superhuman strength. I go to Rurouni Kenshin for my first example; it was a cartoon that I liked back in middle school. And it was a waste of my time. Kenshin, who appeared to be a normal human, could could preform stunts that would ignore just about everything established by physics and human potential.

Comicbook superheroes have an excuse, at least, I guess; Superman is the last son of krypton. Whatever pseudo-science reasoning you attach to it, he's still supposed to be an Alien who can fly and bench-press mount Rushmore. Manga characters have no such substantiation in reason. They are, within the context of the story, just normal people (most of the time). And, even if they do epitomize physical accomplishment, there's no excuse for them to be on par with Krypton's last son. Or even a teenager who was bitten by a radioactive spider (Was it still a radioactive Spider? Really? Marvel hasn't bothered to retcon that yet?).

With the ill-defined exploits of miraculously powerful Japanese people who inexplicably shout out the “Names” of their attacks (Nothing ever so boring as “Hook Punch!!” though. It's always something that has to do with Dragons or Shining light or something)...well, they seem to be the most irritating. That said, I don't read enough Manga or watch enough Anime to offer up any criticism that maintains any sort of validity. Not that that stops me from commenting on the most blatant stereotypes. I'm inclined toward American television and movies, however. Yes, they are, without question, nearly as offensive to a Martial Arts snob like myself. I suppose that it would be best to focus on things that I have actual knowledge of.

More “Americanized” martial artists have been embarrassing themselves for as long as the genre has been around. Guys like Steven Segal and Jean Claude Van Damme have done their best to make Bruce Lee turn in his grave. When an entire genre (yes, “Martial Arts” is a genre) has been degraded to the same old stereotypes and cliches and direct-to-DVD releases...well, that's when you start to wonder if it's a dying breed. Of course, it's always only during the most turbulent times that the savior will appear; Tony Jaa looks to be breathing new life into Martial Arts. An amazing acrobat and athlete in himself and bred to be a “Jackie Chan star” (we're talking Dragon Dynasty Jackie Chan, not Rush Hour Jackie Chan) who does all of his own stunts...most of which would put Mr. Chan in the hospital. The man is amazing. With Asian “Martial Arts” films being a mix of ridiculous gunplay and over-played acrobatics, Tony Jaa brings the medium back to it's roots. That is, I mean, a little Asian guy leaping into the air and smashing a fully grown man's nose in with his flying knee-kick.

And about technical fighting in movies and television where the singular purpose is not the Martial Arts themselves...well, I think that we'll be forever doomed to mediocre fight sequences meant to draw in the “testosterone” crowd that I mentioned earlier. Stunt doubles and wires are the foundation. Of course, one cannot expect every actor to be able to preform breath taking stunts. But they shouldn't have to. Some of my favorite fight scenes of all time were largely preformed by people with no real experience. In The Bourne trilogy, a bit of creative directing convinced me that Matt Damon could kick my ass. What, or course, is the best way to go about this?

Consequences. It's all about being as brutal as possible. No matter the medium, if Batman or Indiana Jones hits people without there being any real sort of visible damage, it really loses it's effect. When people seriously fight there are bruises, broken bones and and spilled blood. I'm not exactly asking for a Sin City level of gratuitous gore, but a to see more than a one-punch knock out, for once in my life, would bring me unparalleled joy (not that I have any sort of problem with Guy Ritchie's Snatch. To the contrary, actually.). Of course, overly stylized and poorly choreographed Kill Bill stuff bothers me just as much. I could probably write another article on what a joke female “Martial Artists” are in most western media. So, I think I might just do that, as I don't really have any desire to be labeled as a misogynist because I don't have the space to explain myself within the context of this piece.

One thing that always needs to be covered? The mechanics and workings of firearms. Ever since John Woo decided to descend up Asian cinema, the integration of high-kicks and handguns has become a stable of the quintessential Martial Arts film. Of course, most of these cop movies involve a healthy mix of Tae Kwon Do and bits of shrapnel from fragmentation grenades tearing through just about every body part imaginable; I have no qualms with this. I couldn't even complain about the “Storm Trooper syndrome” (having no real ability to aim your weapon). I don't even care about bullet-dodging (when it's in Equilibrium). It's inconsistent bullet-dodging that tends to drive me up a wall.

Just about every “Martial Arts Superhero” (The Bat-family, Iron Fist, Daredevil, Green Arrow, etc.) manage to avoid multiple ne'er-do-wells with AK-47's. It's nothing short of spectacular that none of them have taken a bullet to the head yet. I thought that the best sort of solution to this, as realistically, bullet dodging is impossible for humans, was introduced in Batman Begins. Making Batman into a Kevlar-clad ninja effectively eliminated the age-old “Why doesn't someone just shoot him?” question. I suggest that creators begin working toward similar solutions immidiately, figuring out something about each and every character that would more easily allow them to avoid having a .45 caliber round sitting cozily between their eyes.

There's a lot that could (and should) be touched on in regards to this, as writers and artists and actors and directors and...whoever else it is that tends to ignore Bruce Lee's most important teaching; Martial Arts should be realistic. And when they aren't, the least you can do is go out of your way to make sure that our suspension of disbelief isn't pushed too far. Make me believe that your character could kick my ass, and I'll be sold.